New Website, New Look, New Mailing List….

carlos

 

HOWDY WORDPRESSERS,

I have exciting news for you…  I’ve switched from Word Press to my own personal website…   I’m really excited about the freedom I will have to share with you all more Music, WTH Moments, and more inspiration…  If you would like to continue receiving emails and updates from Peauxetic Expressions, please click on the link below.

Please subscribe to my mailing list at  www.peauxeticexpressions.com

 

Thanks again for joining the Peauxetic Expression Family….

 

Carlos

Still Sleeping With The Ex

Ever get that funny feeling like somebody is following you? Like there’s somebody else at home with you but you know you’re alone? Or at least you think you are. Is it a raccoon in your attic? Maybe termites in your walls? You look up into the air vent in your ceiling and your mind must be playing tricks on you. You’ve just seen a pair of beady eyes staring back at you. For “Tracy”, a single mother of 5 in Rock Hill, Charlotte, this was her reality. This was not a ghost or animal, but her ex-boyfriend she broke up with over 12 years ago. Yep, you read right…..12 years.

Tracy did not want to be named because her ex-boyfriend is still on the loose. After he was released from jail two weeks ago, he decided to pay her a visit (unbeknownst to her and her kids). According to her, she had been receiving letters from him while he was in jail and even had him do some odd jobs at her house over a year ago. All of this on top of his drug addiction, which is the primary reason for their breakup 12 years ago. Her ex-boyfriend even went as far as stealing her car to get money for drugs. So you may be wondering just how he made his way into her attic. That part is still unknown, since the only entrance to the attic is inside her house. Authorities found that Tracy’s ex-boyfriend had been stuffing himself inside of the heating unit with old coats as his “cover up”. There were also multiple Sonic cups filled with urine and feces throughout the attic.

This is so crazy, it’s actually funny. I don’t understand how Tracy even entertained this man to allow him to do odd jobs around her house and send her letters while he was in jail. After 12 years of being broken up??? Something besides her attic doesn’t smell right here. There must have been more than odd jobs going on at home between her and the ex-boyfriend. And if he wrote her letters (plural) in jail, chances are she wrote him back some of those times. Once police officers found him in the attic, he quickly fled the scene and has not been caught since. Makes you wonder what’s really going on when you hear those strange noises in your house at night, doesn’t it?

What do you think about this extreme case of stalking?

The Seduction of the “P” Word

It has been known to seduce. It has been known to divide. It comforts and heals. It conquers all feelings of honesty and creates jealousy. It kills and then blames you for the act. It eats away at your soul and lies at the root of all vanity….and disaster. It’s the subtle warning before you see the flashing lights coming towards you. You won’t see it on my sleeve. You won’t always see it on their face. What is this dangerous P word? PRIDE!

I’ve been thinking lately about how pride hinders us (including myself) in so many ways. It tarnishes our relationships, friendships, and even our health. What is it about pride that is so attractive that we must hold on to it for dear life? I know I have been guilty of this before. Whether it’s being sick and trying to be a man about it and just making myself worse (I prefer to just be left alone when I feel sick) or being ashamed to admit that an unexpected expense causes me to need extra cash, I’ve done it. And don’t you find it strange that even after we think we’ve learned the lesson from those prideful moments, we still fall into the same traps?

If you really think about it, we exhibit at least one (if not multiple forms) of pride every day. Let’s start with getting your clothes ready for work. Do you pick out that certain outfit on the meeting day with your big execs because you don’t care how you look (probably not good, lol), you genuinely want to look your best or you want to impress those execs? Chances are, your answer is one of or a mix of the last 2 choices. Then let’s take that dream car you can’t keep your eyes off of. Is it a Bentley, Lexus, Maserati, or Mercedes? You may genuinely like these cars and if so that’s how it should be. But how much do the desires behind our dream cars and houses really cater to what other people think, leaving what we want in the dark? Suppose someone’s dream car is a Kia (highly unlikely). They probably wouldn’t admit this too much, because it’s not a status symbol.

Don’t get me wrong, we should take enough pride in ourselves to look presentable, be confident, and know our own self-worth. But just like there’s a thin line between love and hate, there’s probably an even finer line between unhealthy and healthy pride (if there is such a thing).  Just like some of the foods we eat, we have to use pride sparingly, because it’s never good to be too prideful. No matter who you are, you will need forgiveness, a helping hand, or understanding at some point in your life. And if it hasn’t happened to you yet, your turn is coming.

What are your thoughts on pride? Should we only possess a little of it or avoid this “P” word altogether?

A Scratch And Sniff Kinda Love

I love cologne. A couple of my favorites are Burberry London and Gucci Guilty. To me, you can almost never have too many different kinds. To me, it’s an enhancer to your outward appearance. Almost like the feeling of a fresh hair cut (or shave for me, lol) and a new hair style for ladies. With that being said, I also love perfume. Think about the last time you met someone who looked good and then think about how they smelled. Chances are, their scent either brought them up or down a notch or two on the looks rating, lol.

Meet Judith Prays. She’s a 25-year-old web developer who became fed up with failed attempts at online dating. She decided to create pheromone parties after she ended up in a 2 year relationship with someone who didn’t initially match up against her dating check list. Apparently his smell is what stuck with her the most. Thus the idea of pheromone parties. What exactly is this? Judith started her first pheromone party in New York with about 40 guests who were all told to freeze a T-shirt they’ve slept in for 3 days. The bags containing the shirts are then marked blue for men and pink for women, along with tagged numbers. Half a dozen of the “couples” hit it off and actually made lasting relationships. Right now the pheromone parties are only in New York and Los Angeles, but there is talk of Atlanta and San Diego getting in on the smelly love fest as well.

Ok….yeah this sounds like a very funny idea and something cool to go to and get a good laugh. But for real dating? WTH?! Who does this? I guess Judith does and she seems to be successful with it. But this concept just raises so many eyebrows with me. First of all, what happens if you pick someone based on their scent and they’re not attractive? Or what if they are attractive but you see someone else’s shirt that you didn’t sniff but can’t keep your eyes off of? Do you give your date their shirt back and say, “No thanks, I’ll choose her (or him) instead?” LOL. And then there’s the obvious elephant in the room. What happens if your shirt gets sniffed 10 times and nobody picks you? Talk about a self-esteem let down, lol. Some of the party goers stated that they have smelled marijuana on some of the people’s shirts. WTH?! Really??? Who’s going to smell a shirt laced with marijuana and say, “Oh yeah that’s it! I gotta have em….that smell drives me wild!” Any takers? Didn’t think so.

I think at best this is a great ice breaker to maybe get conversation started. But as far as long-lasting relationships from your sniff mate that you pick….eh, I don’t see it happening. So what do you think about it? Could you ever go to a party like this? If you did, would you really go to pick up a date or just for a good laugh and conversation?

I Can’t Please You

Get a nose job. Butt implants. Breast implants. Lose some weight. You’re too skinny. You need some more muscles. You’re too serious. Cut your hair. Why are you so sarcastic?

These are all things we may hear from people, including our friends and family, on how we should be. Whether it’s our physical appearance or an attitude adjustment, someone will always try to change you. And once you please that person, their tastes will change. If you do manage to please one person, the next person will hate your changes. Then you’re back at square one. Aaagggghhh!!! What do you do? YOU DON’T CHANGE! Huh? I know….it may seem like it doesn’t make sense, but you really should not change. From the day you’re born until the day you die, people will always try to change something about you.

The kicker is, who are you changing for? Is it for you or just to please someone else in the heat of the moment? Someone else whose preferences and thoughts of you may eventually transform. I have found through personal experience and from talking to close friends and family that often times people are just unhappy with themselves. When you are displeased with yourself, you will never fully be able to please someone else….and they will never fully be able to please you. It’s basically like the old saying, “Misery loves company”. Everyone doesn’t realize they are incapable of pleasing themselves or others, but there is a natural human instinct to gravitate towards like forces. In other words, because I’m not happy with myself (whether consciously or subconsciously), my job is to make you feel like I do. Will you be the one to fall prey to this dangerous game??? Hopefully not. If you just have to change something about yourself, make sure it’s a change you want or need to make….not just because someone told you to do it.

I believe that by nature women change for the wrong reasons quicker than men do. Men are stubborn by nature and usually can’t be budged unless they feel like it. Let’s take breast implants for instance. Many women, celebrities and the average woman included, will go through with getting bigger breasts because they think it will get attention. Those bigger breasts may get you in the bed with the guy quicker, but probably not much further than that. Just a thought. Augmentation of the body without augmentation of the mind is useless. But it goes deeper than relationships and men have their faults too. We all change because we want to fit into certain social classes, get attention from people who can nothing for us, and because our family/environment told us that we should. But is it worth it after it’s all said and done?

Is there anything in life that you want to change about yourself? If so, what is the motive behind it? Are you striving to please someone else, while sacrificing yourself? Maybe you’re that person that believes everything happens for a reason and should be left the way it is. Whatever the case, feel free to leave your thoughts and comments!

I Love/Hate You….The Beauty (Part 1)

You’re beautiful. The way you shine so brightly and flaunt your radiance for all to see. Yep, you are extremely breathtaking….literally. More than an eye could ever behold or any space with 4 walls could ever contain. Captivating to the nth degree…that’s what you are….

But you know….after a while, your beauty begins to be sickening. You are stuck to me like white on rice. My neck is itching and my arms are burning! Will you please get off of me???….literally. These beads are rolling down my back. But like all things striking and annoying, this season too shall pass….

SUMMER! Yep, it’s almost here and if you currently live in Texas or have ever passed through it, you know how hot it gets here in the Summer time. Winter is my favorite season. I don’t totally dislike Summer, because it has its perks too, but not without pain. So I decided to put together a list of the 5 reasons I love Summer…and the 5 reasons I hate it:

Summer….Why I Love You (The Beauty)

1. Swimming

Who doesn’t love to get in the pool on a hot day, even if it is just an excuse to show the progress of your workouts? I love water and watching anything on TV about fish, oceans and properties of water, so Summer is the best time for this. You get to go to water parks, have water balloon fights and get one of the best cardio workouts known to man….without ever feeling like you lifted a finger.

2. Ice Cream

Pecan Pralines N Cream…that’s my favorite.  Ice cream and gumbo are two things I can eat all year round. I know what you’re thinking…and I don’t eat them right after each other, lol.  But ice cream, frozen yogurt and slush drinks all seem to taste a little bit sweeter when it’s hot outside. It’s not Summer until you have some ice cream to go along with it.

3. Bringing Sexy Back

 

Let’s face it…one of the main reasons we all love summer is because we get to show off our bodies…and see others show off theirs. People break their necks on treadmills, trying to burn calories and stick to those resolutions more in those months leading up to Summer. It’s the only time you can show too much skin and actually get away with it.

4. Action Movies

Most of your action packed, multi million dollar budget movies will be released in the Summer, or close to it. There are usually so many great movies out at the same time, it’s hard to pick one. This season, we’ll have “The Dark Knight Rises”, “Men In Black III”, “The Amazing Spider Man” and “Total Recall” to look forward to. And if you haven’t seen “The Avengers” yet, what are you waiting for!? The upcoming Summer blockbusters will have to come hard to compete with this one.

5. Longer Days

There’s still 24 hours in a day, but it just feels like you get more done in the Summer. Why? Probably because it gets dark later and you have more daylight. Getting off work at 6:30pm and then having 2 more hours of daylight makes you feel a little more accomplished. It beats searching the parking lot for your car in the dark during winter time….and still having to go to the grocery store after you find it.

Stay tuned….later today I’ll be giving you the 5 reasons why I hate Summer….The Beast!

The Power Of The “F” Word….

I’ve hated. Won. Lost. Been on the receiving and giving end of second chances. Held grudges. Cut people off. Caused myself physical harm. Misunderstood. Loved. Gotten into arguments. Yelled. Made a fool of myself. Sat back and laughed as others have made a fool of themselves trying to get a reaction out of me….all because of the F word….

Yep, I have done all of these things and more because of a simple word we all know….Forgiveness. We all know it’s right to forgive. It’s therapeutic to forgive. It’s beneficial to forgive. But is it ever easy to forgive? In some instances yes, but most times NO. When we’re in the heat of the moment of anger, hurt or pain, forgiveness is the last thing we think about. And sometimes, even if we do forgive quickly, we want to hold on to the anger just a little bit longer so we don’t look weak to the other person…SMH, lol. Sad to say, but it’s true. Think about the last time you got really angry at someone, and then think about how long it took for you to forgive them, or vice versa. Chances are, there was a time gap there that shouldn’t have been.

Last week, I posted a new poem I wrote called “Forgo Forgiveness”. I realized I was holding on to something that happened months ago and the feelings had resurfaced. I wanted to capture that raw emotion we feel when we become upset. This is the time when forgiveness is on the back burner and retaliation is at the forefront. At this point there’s almost no use in talking someone into a forgiving mindset, because they’re probably not thinking straight….and you’ll just end up getting hurt/upset in the process (sometimes it’s best to leave broken glass on the floor…). Who do you need to forgive today? What are you holding on to because you never got that apology you thought you deserved? Has everyone else forgiven you and you’re the only one left to forgive? Sometimes we can be our own worst enemy. Seek forgiveness, whatever the case may be….even if it’s from yourself. And if you don’t get the forgiveness or apology you desire? It’s not the end of the world….just live in the way you want to be treated. Living in a state of not forgiving primarily hurts you and not who you’re mad at.

Check out my poem, “Forgo Forgiveness”…..

I’m going to forgo forgiving you

It takes too much energy to smile and

Fake and laugh in your face

And take a deep breath…

When I really want to punch you

Like the poster child of

Every blood boiling moment

I’ve ever had rolled into one…fist

Make that two

When I think of you

I’m forgoing forgiving you

My stomach churns just to look at you

And the sweetest medicine  

Is watching you suffer

Oh don’t look at me and point your fingers

Many of you bathe in this same acid

The ph balance of your soul is off kilter

So when you cleanse your self

And make it out unscathed

Then come tell your truth

Until then I’ll forgo forgiving you too

Oblivious to the fact that you’ve moved on

While I’m still stuck here holding

On to jagged, crusty edges of memories

That only pierce my existence

Until I resemble a honey comb

Holy, but not full of praise

You are worthy and I am out of place

Out of touch with reality

And missing the clear picture

Forgiveness ain’t all about the listener

We must not forgo the element

That pertains to the speaker